Does 'birdnesting' during separation work?

Parents planning to separate are often concerned about how their children will cope with the change.

That is why, increasingly, couples ending their relationship are considering birdnesting, a co-parenting arrangement where children remain in the family home while parents alternate living there.

"There is preservation of the family home … rather than the children moving between two households," explains Elisabeth Shaw, CEO of Relationships Australia NSW.

"I'm certainly seeing more couples … who do at least raise it as something they could try."

Birdnesting, otherwise known as nesting or magpie parenting, may also happen for financial reasons, where a separating couple cannot afford a viable second property, or when they are unsure if the separation will be permanent.

But does it work? And what should parents consider before giving it a go?

Wanting to reduce disruption for children is the most common reason for birdnesting, according to Gabriella Pomare, a family lawyer and co-parenting coach.

"They stay in their home, with their routines, toys, school, and space exactly the same, which promotes feelings of safety and security at a time of great change.

"Without the immediate stress of familiarising themselves with two new homes, bedrooms, and having to carry things back and forth, they can take time to adjust and process the separation."

Parents may have particular concerns at certain life stages, for example their child completing high school education, says Ms Shaw.

But she adds caregivers sometimes underestimate what their children can handle.

"Some people do it because they really feel their children can't handle the disruption, but generally they can, if the parents can."