After BASE jump tragedy, new doco follows Kiwi widow's journey

Extreme athlete Shayni Couch was skydiving with colleagues in Dubai when she met Micah, who introduced her to BASE jumping - jumping from a high object with a parachute.

Three years after their wedding in Shayni's hometown of Tutukākā, Micah died after jumping from a mountain in Norway.

InShayni in the Sky, Shayni takes their son Lincoln, who she was newly pregnant with when widowed, to his father's final resting place.

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Micah - who worked as a skydive instructor and videographer - had a big, outgoing personality, Shayni says.

Even though a BASE jumping accident took his life in 2017, she is inspired watching him do the sport they both loved in Shayni in the Sky.

"I'm just so grateful that we are sharing [Micah's passion] with other people because it's really inspirational."

In Seattle, where she and Lincoln now live. Shayni still skydives every weekend, but she no longer BASE jumps.

Because the margin for error is extremely low in BASE jumping, people who do it are aware that the sport carries a high risk of fatality, she says.

While those who jump off mountains or out of a plane are often labelled "adrenaline junkies" and "thrill-seekers", the experience is actually more profound, Shayni says, and "good for the soul".

"It's a really beautiful experience that brings peace and calm and a reset in life. I found that with BASE jumping and skydiving.

"The experience itself is actually very much centred around being completely present and in the moment. We don't get that so much in our lives these days. We're inundated by distractions and different thoughts about work and life, and everything.

"In that moment when you actually jump off the mountain or leave the aircraft, you're completely present. That, in itself, is just such an incredible experience."

Micah would be "absolutely thrilled" to know that one of his lifelong dreams - going to space - came true.

Thanks to their friend Sheikha Latifa - daughter of Dubai's ruler Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum - Micah's remains are now aboard a memorial space flight, Shayni says.

"What an amazing thing that I can track where he is orbiting the Earth. That's pretty cool."

The busyness of caring for Lincoln - now 7 - was a blessing after Micah died, Shayni says.

"Being a mother and going through that, I think I really was focused on my son … It allowed me to kind of have a focus and have a direction."

Surrounding herself with people who were happy to talk about him was also beneficial, Shayni says, and following her own intuition about where she needed to be at any given time.

"That was definitely one of the things that helped a lot, just following my feeling."

Death is an awkward topic to talk about, Shayni says, and many people don't know how to engage with someone who's grieving.

"The thing that I really appreciated going through that journey was people who wanted to share stories with me or talk to me about it, and weren't afraid to come to me and say what they were feeling and allow me the space to feel comfortable to talk about it."

For her, the fact of death doesn't make life any less amazing.

"[Gratitude] is very present with me in my life now, and that's changed me and my perspective."

The "perfect example" of resilience is how Shayni in the Sky director Gabriel Garton describes Shayni Couch.

While filming her for the documentary, the New York filmmaker was diagnosed with a rare progressive neuromuscular disease. While editing the film, he was housebound.

"I had intense surgery, and I couldn't walk for around eight weeks during editing. The entire time, I was just watching how resilient she was in her life. There are so many helpful ideas] can come out of this film - stay focused, enjoy the quiet moments in between and really be thankful for what you do have. I think Shayni is a perfect example of that."

Shayni and Lincoln Couch will travel to New Zealand for the premiere of Shayni in the Sky at the Doc Edge Film Festival, which runs from June 24 to August 25. Shayni in the Sky will be playing in Auckland on 12 July and 13 July, with further screenings in Wellington and Christchurch.